And talking about fast, the hypermarket service inside the mall --which, out of respecting them, I will identify here only as "Surabaya Golden City Mall's Carrefour"-- is actually pretty fast. If only people whom Isman identified as Indonesian shoppers obey the rules (1).
OK, here are the rules:
1. If there's a line, you get at the end of the line, and you wait your turn.And if you consider yourself as a lucky person, upon entering other places, you might still find other annoyances. So the rules goes on...
2. You own ONE place in the line. You do NOT have the right to invite friends with their own shops to join you in the line. This is rude to the people behind you, who got there before your friends, and will now have to wait longer. If you want to be with your friends, you can join them at the back of the line. And, no, it's not enough to ask the person immediately behind you if it's OK for your friends to butt in. This person does not speak for the entire line. Also this person pretty much has to say yes, but only because he or she, being less rude than you, wants to avoid confrontation.
EXCEPTION: You may invite an immediate family member such as your spouse or child to join you in the line. There are no other exceptions.
EXCEPTION: Dian Sastro.
3. If you're one of those people who go directly to the front of the line and either pretend you don't see the line, or act as though you somehow KNOW that your situation is more urgent than that of anybody else waiting, and somebody in line objects, and you make some vague apology but remain at the front of the line, you will rot in hell. Also the cashier will hate you, although generally he or she will say nothing, as cashiers don't get paid enough to argue with jerks.
4. If you realize that you forgot an item, you're allowed to go get it, provided that (a) you apologize to the people behind you, (b) you know exactly where the item is, and (c) you hurry. If you forgot TWO items, take your cart out of line. You are NOT allowed to leave your cart blocking the line while you wander the aisles trying to recall the ingredients for Beef Tongue Steak.
NOTE: Before you serve beef tongue to innocent people, you should think about the kinds of things that cows lick.
5. If you're in the express lane, and the sign says 8 ITEMS OR LESS, then you should have no more than . . . OK, we'll allow 10 items. We're not Nazis here.
EXCEPTION: Dian Sastro can have as many items as she wants.
6. If you're talking on your cell phone in public, and people keep glancing at you, it's not because they're impressed by the fact that you are a busy, productive person with a high-end cell phone which has sparkling lights that could beat any disco's. It's because YOU'RE TALKING TOO LOUD._______
7. And at a movie theater, do not talk during the movie unless you have something important to say. (Example: ''My water just broke.'') You may talk quietly during the previews of coming attractions.
EXCEPTION: Dian Sastro.
8. (This rule was suggested by my friend, Meta, who one day will open fire with a machine gun in a public restroom:) If you're a woman using a toilet, and, because you are dainty and fastidious, you elect not to sit on the seat, but instead hover over it like a UFO from the Planet Weewee, and as a result you spatter the seat, do NOT just leave your mess, as if no human will ever use this toilet again. CLEAN UP AFTER YOURSELF.
EXCEPTION: Sorry, Dian. Meta says you, too.
(1) If rules are no longer works, try other ways.
(Thanks to Isman)
NOTE: This is purely based on Dave Barry's writings.
If you travel by air, even occasionally, chances are you have been stuck in an airport terminal at one time or another. I don't know anyone who hasn't spent longer sitting in an airport chair than the airplane ride itself at some point. Airports have become small microcosms of society. There are places to eat, places to shop, places to meet people...
